Jokes Galore !!

Its simple , tell a joke make our day lmao :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

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:kiss: :giveheart: leo

Permalink Reply by Ràwhéàt on March 7, 2010 at 6:59pm: A man in a pub asks for a beer.
The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar."
"One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?"
"Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars."
"Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?"
The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"."
The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by ©thredz on March 8, 2010 at 1:10pm: lolllllz awww pooor bartender!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ràwhéàt on March 8, 2010 at 8:45pm: Son - "Dad whats the difference between confident and confidential?"
Dad - "Hmm. You are my son. Of that I am confident. Your friend Timmy is also my son. That's confidential."; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by LIVAI WAQA on March 9, 2010 at 1:59am: Hahhahahahahahah...so tale mai na ka confidential...KAILA MELE...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by LIVAI WAQA on March 9, 2010 at 9:45pm: A young unmarried girl discovers that she is pregnant.

Scared??..She confides this ' news' to her mother.

Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did This to you?

I want to know!" The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature And distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the Girl, and tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the Problem. However, I can't marry her because of my personal family Situation, but I'll take responsibility.

If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach villa and a $1,000,000 bank account.

If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $2,000,000 bank account.

If it is twins, a factory and $1,000,000 each.

However, If there is a miscarriage or unsuccessful delivery , what do you suggest I do?"

At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him...

"You can try again!!!"

Money face,se vaevei...sa dri yani.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ràwhéàt on March 9, 2010 at 10:14pm: A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this...

Looking for man with these qualifications:
- won't beat me up
- won't run away from
- is great in bed.

She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day.
The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away."
So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?"
Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn't I?"; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by thief of baghdad on March 11, 2010 at 9:08pm: Two parents take their son on vacation and go to a nude beach. The
father goes for a walk on the beach and the son goes and plays in
the water. He comes running up to his mom and says, "Mommy, I saw
ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!"

The mom says "the bigger they are, the dumber they are." So he goes
back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says,
"Mommy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's!"

Mom says, "the bigger they are, the dumber they are." So he goes
back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says,
"Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw and
the more and more he talked, the dumber and dumber he got!"; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ràwhéàt on March 11, 2010 at 9:12pm: A man, who smelled like a distillery, flopped down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and
began reading.
After a few minutes the disheveled man turned to the priest and said, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading that the Pope does."; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by LIVAI WAQA on March 11, 2010 at 9:15pm: Veivoli Fijian Style.

"Hey Semisi! I have a cow for you for just $500!"

"E, vinaka Jone! I'll take it - you can bring it to my koro tomorrow!

The next day: "Sorry Semisi, but the cow, thing died last night."

"Seti seti, mau-mau.! Okay then, just give me my yalavo back."

"Sorry Semisi, I already spent that money."

"Cici levu! So, ok then. Just bring me the dead cow."

So Jone brought the dead cow to Semisi the next morning.
A few weeks later, Jone bumped into Semisi and asked him what he did with the dead cow:

"You won't believe, Jone! I made a raffle for the cow, and I sold 251 tickets for $5 each! I made a profit of $750! But, I didn't tell anyone the cow was dead."

"Kemudou! And the fullahs, they didn't complain?"

"Sega! Only the fullah which won! So, I gave him back his $5 and he was happy!"

Taki!...Taki..Taki...Sa Dri yani; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by thief of baghdad on March 11, 2010 at 9:20pm: A guy looks for a job for 3 years without having one. He was finally invited to an interview. the rule for the interview is that the least wrong answer becomes a risk, and interviewees are free to correct the panel on any proposition, and instantly get the job. The guy entered, well dressed and greeted. their firs question was
" what is your name?"
quickly, in a bid to correct them answered
"please, WHAT is not my name, my name is Joe
He was asked to back next time lmaoo; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by LIVAI WAQA on March 11, 2010 at 9:26pm: Hahahahahahaha...wararasa...REMINDER...Never take talkative children with you...[reply to Thiefs "nude beach vacation"]; ▶ Reply to This